• Don't Mind If I Do •

I love my Definitive 7 disc Collectors Edition of The War Of The Worlds 👽🚀👍✨ (Taken with instagram)

My mate Craig Robson has designed these amazing handmade key fobs. Check out: http://daggersforteeth.bigcartel.com/ and get one. He also does lots of cool shit like prints, T-shirts, patches etc…”

It’a cold down the promenade with my love @claire_monster so it’s hoods up 🍃🍂🍁 (Taken with instagram)

I like to make chairs from champagne bottle tops 😁 (Taken with instagram)

Christmas gift from my girl @claire_monster. The War Of The Worlds poster from the 1953 movie 👽🎥✨ (Taken with instagram)

Big fat robin, Merry Christmas everyone! 🎄🎅👍 (Taken with instagram)

Love coming home to my girls 👸🐱 @claire_monster #littlemissruby (Taken with instagram)

woolfie:

I’ve been playing the role of Santa for Monster Energy again this year, stopping by at 5 of our favourite places. 

1. The best tattoo Studio in the world: Forever True, in Liverpool.
2. LS-Live in Wakefield. A really REALLY cool rehearsal studio for bands, but with a difference. It’s for arena sized bands. Absolutely huge! So bands can come in and set up their full arena set up. LS-Live also make staging and riggings, along with all the big rigs for Monster Energy. 
3. SecretSpot in Scarborough. The best place for east coast Surfing gear and knowledge!
4. Subvert in Manchester, Really cool Snowboard & Skate store. Based in Chill Factore. These guys know what they’re talking about!
5. Big Woody’s in Blackpool. Skate store selling some really good gear! Skateboards, Longboards, the lot. Really nice clothing store too!

anyway… it took me two days to deliver those five packages, and it got me thinking, how does the real Santa do it?

“Santa has about 31 hours of Christmas to work with, thanks to the different time zones and the rotation of the earth, assuming he travels east to west (which seems logical). This works out to 967.7 visits per second.This is to say that for each Christian household with a good child, Santa has around 1/1000 of a second to park the sleigh, hop out, jump down the chimney, fill the stockings, distribute the remaining presents under the tree, eat whatever snacks have been left for him, get back up the chimney, jump into the sleigh and get on to the next house. Assuming that each of these 108 million stops is evenly distributed around the earth (which, of course, we know to be false, but will accept for the purposes of our calculations), we are now talking about 0.78 miles per household; a total trip of 75.5 million miles, not counting bathroom stops or breaks. This means Santa’s sleigh is moving at 650 miles per second—3,000 times the speed of sound. For purposes of comparison, the fastest man-made vehicle, the Ulysses space probe, moves at a poky 27.4 miles per second, and a conventional reindeer can run (at best) 15 miles per hour.The payload of the sleigh adds another interesting element. Assuming that each child gets nothing more than a medium sized Lego set (two pounds), the sleigh is carrying over 500 thousand tons, not counting Santa himself. On land, a conventional reindeer can pull no more than 300 pounds. Even granting that the “flying” reindeer could pull ten times the normal amount, the job can’t be done with eight or even nine of them-Santa would need 360,000 of them. This increases the payload, not counting the weight of the sleigh, another 54,000 tons, or roughly seven times the weight of the Queen Elizabeth (the ship, not the monarch).600,000 tons travelling at 650 miles per second creates enormous air resistance-this would heat up the reindeer in the same fashion as a spacecraft re-entering the earth’s atmosphere. The lead pair of reindeer would absorb 14.3 quintillion joules of energy per second each. In short, they would burst into flames almost instantaneously, exposing the reindeer behind them and creating deafening sonic booms in their wake. The entire reindeer team would be vaporised within 4.26 thousandths of a second, or right about the time Santa reached the fifth house on his trip.Not that it matters, however, since Santa, as a result of accelerating from a dead stop to 650 m.p.s. in .001 seconds, would be subjected to acceleration forces of 17,500 g’s. A 250 pound Santa (which seems ludicrously slim) would be pinned to the back of the sleigh by 4,315,015 pounds of force, instantly crushing his bones and organs and reducing him to a quivering blob of pink goo.”
 

Luckily for parents everywhere… Kids aren’t that good at maths.

Have a good Christmas!
Woolfie x 

My favourite Christmas album, Hillbilly Casino - Hang Up Your Stockings And Say Your Prayers! 🎅🎄😜👍 (Taken with instagram)

My rockin’ mate Dan Woolfie & the Monster Energy crew dropped off this great Christmas gift at the studio today, thanks buddy 😜👍✨ (Taken with Instagram at Forever True)